Why I Want To Be A Sociopath


If the road to hell is paved with good intentions, and there’s a lot of evidence that it might be, does this mean we should now fully embrace the corollary? What if the road to Heaven is all about bad intentions? Should we all now embrace our inner bastard?

Wear it loud and proud. If everything we intend is ultimately blown back at us, then why not beat the Universe at its own game? Let’s all become sociopaths. Let’s give even less than a curse for the man next door. Let’s exploit negative capability to its ultimate degree. Stop giving up your seat on the bus to that whining old bag in the corner. She’ll just use the comfort to complain all the more.

Don’t be nice to your or anybody else’s children. The ungrateful bastards don’t appreciate it, and even if they do, that’s just a sign of tragic neediness. Don’t give to the needy. It’s mostly just a balm for your woozy conscience anyway. You think the foul mouthed alkie on the street will be cursing you any less fervently in ten minutes time?

Stop doing favours for people. In particular, never give someone a favour they have asked for. People resent having to ask for favours anyway, so it’s only a matter of time before they start to resent you for demonstrating your power over them. Never vote socialist. Only ever vote for those amoral scumbags who hate your non-millionaire guts but have promised you a tax cut (in fairness, quite a lot of you have already been doing this for some time).

Most of us do all these things, consciously or not, in a half-hearted sort of way. The further away from home charity begins, the better for everyone. If we commit to the creed of sociopathy like true converts, like newly awakened believers, instead of in the usual sleepy, half-assed way, then according to the utterly bent laws of the (apparently) holographic universe, Nirvana can only be a heartbeat away.


One thought on “Why I Want To Be A Sociopath

  1. Well as Enda would say ‘will you go on our dat and stop whinjin’. Mind you it does make a lick of sense. However this ol world could do with a lot more kindness especially given the nature of ‘governance’ in our land.


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